How My Mom’s Death Changed My Definition of Family


  1. Bernita Allen
    Bernita Allen March 21, 2014 at 7:09 am .

    My heart goes out to you, so sorry about your loss. This is a beautifully written and for me sad post. Losing a family member is never easy. You are so right in the things you said. Thank you for sharing her memory.

  2. Cheri Hudson Passey
    Cheri Hudson Passey March 21, 2014 at 8:04 am .

    I felt the same way when both of my Grandmothers died just 6 months apart a few years ago. Puts everything in a new perspective when thinking about our ancestors.
    Thanks for the post.

  3. Colleen
    Colleen March 21, 2014 at 8:17 pm .

    I am very sorry to read about your Mom’s death. It is a loss that never goes away but your love for her will never go away either. And it does redefine many things in life, including ‘family’. You can write down her stories so the future will know her as you did. The writing may be painful at first but then you will feel better that you shared.

    1. Rachael Rifkin
      Rachael Rifkin March 23, 2014 at 1:40 am .

      I’m glad you mentioned writing down my mom’s stories, Colleen. I’ve been thinking about doing that soon. I’m looking forward to it but I’m also kind of nervous about it. I’m sure I’ll be glad I did it.

      Thanks for writing! I like your ideas. :-)

  4. Rachael Rifkin
    Rachael Rifkin March 21, 2014 at 9:39 pm .

    Thank you for your kind words, Bernita. Sharing memories of my mom is very therapeutic.

  5. Rachael Rifkin
    Rachael Rifkin March 21, 2014 at 9:53 pm .

    Thanks for sharing your experience, Cheri. I didn’t lose anyone close to me until I was 21. First my paternal grandmother died, and then my maternal grandfather died nine months later. It took me longer to come to terms with my grandfather’s death because I was still processing my grandmother’s when he died. That was a long, sad, confusing year.

    After my mom died, it was really weird to realize that my mom had technically become an ancestor. Definitely makes you look at your family and present/future differently afterwards.

  6. Colleen
    Colleen March 24, 2014 at 8:18 am .

    Rachel, it won’t be easy but the sooner you can bring yourself to do it the more you will remember. And later generations will be glad you found the strength to do it so she will be ‘alive’ to them.

    1. Rachael Rifkin
      Rachael Rifkin March 24, 2014 at 5:25 pm .

      Very true, Colleen. Good advice! :-)

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